Saturday, April 9, 2011

Life happens, I guess

I feel awful that I haven't posted in awhile.  Things got a little dramatic for awhile.  Had a major falling out with someone I thought was a good friend.  After several weeks of feeling used and manipulated, Matt and I were basically dropped after introducing her to new people.  I've been trying to sort through my feelings and reactions to the whole situation but it's hard. 

I've never had many female friends that I could really rely on.  Throughout my short 23 years, I've only really had one that has stuck around for any actual length of time (that being about 5 years and counting).  Recently, I've had a woman come back into my life that I thought I had lost forever.  We had a really rough time of it not long before I moved to Norman.  Before that, she was my best friend and confidant.  I've seen her maybe twice in the nearly three years I've been in Norman.  Those few times were enough for both of us to see how much the other had grown up.  Now we talk almost every day, and she is moving up here (possibly moving in with us) in August.  Even Matt, who for the last several years has professed a strong dislike (very close to despising) for her, is convinced she has changed and is good with idea of her being in our lives again.

Maybe it's because I've been hurt so many times by the women that have come into my life, but once a female wrongs me it's hard for me to ever trust them again.  Or maybe it's because I was raised around men for the majority of my life other than my mom and Meme (grandmother); we all have more masculine personalities than many of the women I have come across.  I still have my petty/catty moments and love to dress up and make myself up, but I don't want to deal with drama.  I basically refuse to.

So maybe I blew this whole situation out of proportion, but I don't like being treated like shit.  I definitely don't like it when someone makes me feel manipulated or used. 

Sorry to vent at you guys like this, but I had to get it out.

My next post will be another successful recipe.  Hopefully I'll start watching more movies so I can review them for you guys, like I previously suggested.


1 comment:

ixy said...

I can really relate. Women are vicious from their tween years on, and after the most recent fiasco, I've decided I'd rather not have close friendships other than my husband. That sounds harsh, but the so-called close friendships I thought I had turned out to be imaginary anyway. Good luck with your revived best friendship - I truly hope it works out for you.

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