Friday, August 19, 2011

Movies my boyfriend doesn't want you to know he likes

We all have our guilty pleasures.  Some collect toys, others watch anime.  If you're like me it's sushi, ninety's television, and French culture/decor.  Even guys have them.  I don't know about the men in your life, but Matt has a tendency to love cute movies.  Yep, manly Matt loves cute movies.  I thought I would share with you a few of his favorites that I also love.

Yep, the boy's favorite chick flick is 10 Things I Hate About You, by far!  He also likes Fools' Gold.  I love that I can watch these with him!!

So this one, I'm not exactly supposed to tell you he thought was adorable but I'm going to anyway.  He loved this one!

This movie had us both rolling with laughter.  When I found it on my Netflix streaming, he insisted we watch it.
This one is my favorite.  We watched this on my little bitty tv in my bedroom at the 'rents house.  He had recently had his back surgery and was high on his pain meds.  The funniest thing I have ever heard happened that night.  My little brother walked by and made some crack about Matt watching this and Matt replied with "It's cuuuute!"  Yep, he was gone haha!

I think if Matt read this, I would be in big trouble.  But that's what makes this post so much fun!  What is your guy's guilty pleasure?

Monday, August 15, 2011

Something Broke

I felt it snap
it was like guitar string
3 octaves too tight.

You plucked and tuned
until I wore
too thin.

There should be
raw ends and
unspun lines
but I don't feel it.

It's bleak
there's nothing
I'm blank.

Something broke
and now
it's gone.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Uncertain Truths

These past few weeks have been very trying times for me.  Hopefully I will soon be able to share some of this with you my friends, but I haven't seen the end of it all and don't want to make much out things that could be insignificant.

I have, however, come to some realizations about myself that I felt have changed me somewhat.  If you don't mind, I want to share some of these things with you.  You all have come to know me so well, some even better than I know myself, and have shared some of your innermost secrets and feelings with me, so I feel I owe it to you to do the same.

My beliefs have become very convoluted and mixed.  I believe in the power of the earth.  I believe we are not alone but what else there could be eludes me.  I believe that we must respect our place here on earth and respect the earth itself.  At times, I feel so insignificant that I cannot seem to even imagine where I fit in in this complex and enormous universe.

My past has also come back to haunt me quite a bit lately.  Things that I thought I had blocked out or forgot have come rushing back.  I've realized how messed up my mind really is at times because of these things.  I am damaged.  I have issues.  Yes, we all are and we all do, but I can't seem to come to terms with my past.  Every time I think I've got it under control, I lose it.  I don't think anyone really knows everything I've been through.  It scares me to share with anyone.  I'm afraid people won't respect me or will blame me for these things. 

Part of me thinks I will never find someone who can accept me with all my baggage.  Who won't judge or hold things against me when I do or say odd things.  Like, there are days I need to be completely alone.  No human interaction, no pups, nothing.  For some reason that offends people.  Yes, these tend to be the days I lock myself away and just cry.  There really isn't a reason, it just happens.  Or what I like to call "my moods."  I get severely depressed at times, for unknown reasons.  I can't explain what's wrong because I don't know.

I'm ready to settle down but at the same time, I'm afraid to lose my independence.  I don't want to have to answer to anyone.  I hate being questioned about what I'm doing or who I'm talking to or why I'm doing what I'm doing.  I need someone who can keep up with me but stand back and let me be me at the same time.

I miss the country.  Give me trees and dirt and (eek) bugs over all this concrete any day.  I miss being able to clearly see the stars and walk in the grass barefooted.  I need room to roam and escape.  I'm a country girl at heart, as much as I love the city.  I am high maintenance for a country girl, I like my clothes, shoes, jewelry, and electronics.  But I can have all this without living in the middle of town.  Without having to worry about waking my neighbors when I decide I want to have 50 people over to drink and have a good time.

I have to have a nightlife or I go crazy.  I'm talkin, bar one night, club the next, and naked pool beer pong the next!  Here lately, my free time has been spent drinking and partying.  Yes, I know I'm getting too old to do this all the time, but I don't care.  I crave the atmosphere.  I'm not one to sit at home every night watching television or the like.  I can't sit still.  I'd rather sleep all day and be up all night.

Maybe I've always known these things about myself.  Maybe I just need to get them out there and accept it all.  I feel like there is more to life than what I have been dealt and I want it all.  I want my own family, my nightlife, my country-in-stilettos dream.  I want to be accepted for the screwed up person I am and not be questioned because of my beliefs or past experiences.

So there is what has been eating at me.  It feels good to get some of that out there.  I have some catching up to do on all of your blogs and I promise to get on that pronto.  As soon as I get my a/c fixed.  AGAIN.  This computer kills me when it's hot in my house.

Hope y'all are having wonderful weekends.  Give the kiddos hugs for me when they head back to school.

G'night lovelies, and thank you for being here for me.  It is appreciated more than you will ever know.


Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Tank's Newest Experiment

Ever had an animal that likes to stare death straight in the eye and laugh?  Yeah I have one of those.  You've all met Tank.  If not, don't worry, this post will tell you almost everything you need to know about this sweet, headstrong, dumb puppy of mine.

So I'm sitting on my lunch at work, when I see a text from Matt.  It said something about Tank getting a hold of my camera case (camera is in my purse that is now out of his reach at night) and Matt's deodorant.  It also had a cryptic message about him possibly being really chill for a few days.  Knowing that there were allergy pills on the coffee table and that I had found an old bottle of muscle relaxers the day before and wasn't sure where I had left them that night.

Sure enough, the little shit had gotten a hold of the muscle relaxers.  Having no car (it's in desperate need of fixing right now), I had to sit at work and act like I wasn't having a panic attack.  Not only were those pills out of date, they were strong as hell.  I should have thrown them away, but with no doctor and a bad back I thought I would see if they would help even a lil.

Finally after 4 hours of going absolutely crazy, I got the chance to go call my vet.  The stupid ditzy girl they had recently hired answered the phone.  I gave her the name of the pills and asked what I should do.  She had no idea what they were.  Seriously?  For my back, they don't give you no name shit.  At least when I had a doctor she didn't.  After talking to her like a child, she told me to bring him in immediately.

How the hell was I supposed to do that?  Ask a coworker if I could borrow her car of course.  I rushed home to find a puppy who's pupils were so big I couldn't see the color in them and eyes more bloodshot than normal for this particular puppy.  He was acting fine, but Tank is my child.  I took him in.  And was told that they couldn't do anything for him and I'd have to take him to the AER that almost killed Roxi.

Uh, no.

I got my way.  The doctor gave him charcoal to absorb any of the pills that his stomach hadn't yet absorbed.

Little Man is doing fine now.  I was soooo worried though!!!  You have no idea.  He's my child.  I love that little shit.

Well I'm off to finish my beer and have a lil more fun tonight!


Saturday, August 6, 2011

On Fire!!!

What?  Yeah, that's right.  I'm on fire.  Physically (mostly from the crazy Oklahoma weather, but partly from working out).  Emotionally (not in the good way, things kinda suck but that's life).  And my blog apparently!!  In my unintended leave of absence from my lil corner of the blogosphere, my lovely bloggie bestie Sarcasm Goddess gave me an award.  She's pretty amazing and absolutely hilarious, you should check her out!  She's the one who really got me out of my shell on here and basically killed my habit of blushing when blogging about vaginas and the whatnot that goes along with them.  She gave me this award because I "pierce my body without fear" and because I'm almost as awesome as she is.

If you haven't looked through my blog, then you wouldn't know that I have 11 body piercings.  That's right, 11.  I plan to add to that number, but I'm not sure what I want next.  I'll have to do a future post with a poll in it possibly.

Anyway, things haven't really changed much around here.  The dogs are still being nutty.  Although, Tank did decide to go on a dog's version of a panty raid this morning when we opened the backdoor for them.  He went through BOTH of my purses that were out on the end table and decided that their contents needed to decorate the backyard.  My checkbook, ID, debit card, cash, lotion, camera, GPS, and random other things were strewn about, shredded if possible.  NOT how I wanted to wake up today...

After cleaning up the yard as best I could, still looking for my house key... I called my bank to report my card "lost or stolen".  Yes, I'm lazy and instead of going in I just called that number.  Here's how the beginning of that conversation went:

Lady: blahblahblah bank how may I help you?

Me: Um... I need to report my debit card... uh... eaten by my dog...

Lady: Seriously? *giggles*  That sounds kinda like the "dog ate my homework" excuse.

Me: No really, he chewed it up... It isn't usable now....

Lady: Oh.  Well I can.... blahblahblah

Do they really think I would make up something THAT ridiculous?!?!?!  Okay, yeah they can see all the weird ass places I use my card, but still.  Doesn't mean they know me!!

So dumbass I am, instead of seeing if I can still use my card, I get it cancelled and now have little to no access to my paycheck I got 24 hours ago... I wrote a check for a damn T-shirt tonight!!  It was worth it though, it was a Fangtasia T-shirt from True Blood (vamp obsession, remember?).  Oh and I got another one for half off that has female super heroes and says "We Run This Town."  Love it!  I also replaced the clutch Tank destroyed above.  It was red and black leopard print and is absolutely perfect to use for going out!

Yeah I think that's about the only real story I have from my LoA.  I'll have more things later as they unfold, but I don't want to drag on and on, so on to the award section!!!

So the rules for this are: thank who gave it to me, 7 factos, and 10 recipients.  I think we can do this.  As I said in the beginning, the wonderful and amazing Sarcasm Goddess gave me this prestigious award.  She is the embodiment of awesome-ness.

  1. This award makes me super happy because I am a pyro.  I love the flames on the picture.  However, when I saw a local apartment complex on fire today I almost vomited.  I know people who lived/still live there.  It was awful.  Two buildings completely destroyed... Cars on fire... One of my coworkers/friends is probably staying with me for awhile because of this.
  2. I have lost 10 more pounds since I started working out!  I'm down to 176 which is amazing!!  I can fit some of my old clothes.  Still a ways to go, but I'm happy with the progress.
  3. I believe in ghosts.  I've seen and felt ghosts.  I don't care how crazy that makes me sound, I know what I've experienced.
  4. My great great some-or-other great uncle was the guy who pulled Belle Starr (Oklahoma outlaw) out of the river when she was shot off her horse.  My great great some-or-other great grandmother was with her when she died.
  5. My phone is dumb.  It has decided that it will only charge in the warehouse at work or sometimes when plugged up to my computer unless I want to hold it up in the air for hours.  I really need to call the warranty people about it... I miss my iPhone4...
  6. I've come to realize that some of the people I've been really close to lately are starting to offend me.  They make snide remarks or blow off how I feel about things.  I'm not one to be walked all over or ignored.  Maybe they should read this... I've started avoiding them when I can, they don't even realize it.
  7. My job has really been the bright part of my days lately.  I love my customers; the crazy old men, flirty guys, loving women, grandmothers, cooks, nurses, all of them!  Most people would say it must suck that work is the bright part of my day, but since all I seem to do now is work (meh, it brings in the moneys... that I can't really get to right now...) it's good that it's a bright part.

And for my On Fire Blogs!

If I have to explain my reasoning for choosing these wonderful women, well, you don't know good blogging!  Haha, just kidding, but still they are all absolutely amazing!!

Off to bed to begin this long ass week of work, but first finishing Ghost Adventures with Zak Bagan... yumm...